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News U Absolutely, Positively, Cannot Use (Feb 2 Edition)

In world news, Sec of State Hillary Clinton announced that the real reason behind all the rioting and demonstrations in Egypt has nothing to do with the government after all. Turns out people there are just pissed that Zaxby’s is gonna start charging .35 cents for that lil azz pack of Zax Sauce beginning March 1st…….

A huge scandal has broken out in the comedy world as pictures and video have surfaced on the internet with comedian Bruce Bruce and US Congresswoman Maxine Waters. In the video Bruce is wearing only a t shirt and footies, and the congresswoman appears to be intoxicated……

An ugly lawsuit is pending following an incident involving producer Jermaine Dupri, comedian Kevin Hart, and our very own Juicy. They were having lunch at a Miami area Red Lobster over the weekend when the waitress insisted they sit in high chairs and order of f the kids menu. To add to the humiliation she brought out those little coloring sheets and crayons. Even though he was very angry, Kevin did color a really nice picture of an octopus and a fisherman……

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